“The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.”
— William Jones
It was Sunday afternoon when Avi and I were inspecting a wooden skateboard that he had made while we were having a playdate at his house. Noticing a big, white iMac in the corner of his room, I asked him what he used it for. He told me he used it for flying on his flight simulator, and with the words ‘flying’ and ‘airplanes,’ I got very excited.
“Can I try flying?”
“Yes! Of course you can.” He pulled up the software, Xplane 12, and quickly whipped up a new airplane. I watched, amazed, at his flight to Los Angeles and the incredible flips he was doing. He let me have a turn flying a Cessna 172 without me even having to ask. I was surprised by what a good host he was and the kindness continued.
Even though Avi had a thousand times the experience of flying that I had, I gave a few suggestions about where he could land, where he could do a flip, and which airplane he should fly. “Thanks for reminding me, Dawson.”
I appreciated when he lent his experience by giving me kind suggestions and warnings. Once when I didn’t take his idea, I crashed into a tree in Castro Valley while trying to land. So, the next time I made sure to listen carefully to every word he said and implement his suggestions. It was at his house that I landed my first airbus. We laughed together and gave each other fist bumps.
Avi and I were both having a great time while supporting each other in positive ways. From this experience, I realized that collaboration and appreciation are meaningful ingredients to establishing a stable and deep friendship.
How do I find friendships where we can appreciate each other’s ideas? It takes time to observe how people behave. The base of any friendship is kindness. Beyond that, I look for friends who are responsible, humble, and consistent.
I believe in appreciating each other's ideas.